Divided
by CloudSpires1295
Summary: Sisfic Coda to 9x10 "Road Trip". If there was one thing Shay hated, it was seeing her brothers at odds. The only thing she hated more was knowing that, this time around, their relationship was never going to be the same again. Rated T for swearing.


**I'm trying to continue "Family Reunion", I really am, but at the moment, these one shots are a bit easier. There's a little spoiler alert for what Shay's going through while out of the picture. Other than that, enjoy this short.**

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Shay pressed a soft kiss to Sam's cheek as Cas brushed his palm over his forehead, healing the marks left over from the needles. She looked up at him, "how're you feeling, tiger?" Sam shook his head as if to clear it and mumbled, "better."

"We'll do this in stages," Cas explained, "it'll be easier that way."

Shay pulled her sasquatch of a little brother's jacket more firmly around him, trying to shelter him from the light rainfall. She felt him tense in her hold and looked up as Dean approached, an eyebrow raised in question. He held back a few feet away, as if unsure of how to approach.

"C'mon Cas," Shay grabbed the angel's arm and pulled him away to a safe distance, "let them talk." The huntress and the angel moved further down the dock, and Shay swung herself up to perch on the railing, twiddling her thumbs.

"Do you think they'll ever… be okay?" Cas asked hesitantly. Shailene looked away, considering his question, "Cas, I really don't… not even the demon blood thing was quite this bad. Okay, well it was but not in the same way that this whole rogue angel possession thing was. I've been ridden by a demon before and it's a violating experience, to be honest," she trembled slightly in memory, "Sam's been possessed three separate times now, and this time around, Dean just _orchestrated_ for it to happen. I don't think I'd ever be able to look at Dean the same again if he'd tricked me into letting an angel in, but I can't speak for Sammy. This one's between them."

 _Doesn't change the fact I'm fucking pissed that he did this to Sam right under my damn nose and lied to my face when I asked him what he did to get Sam better_ , the huntress grumbled a low curse under her breath and looked up, concerned as Dean turned away from Sam and began to make his way back to the Impala. Their younger brother made no move to follow and, if he wasn't moving then neither was Shay.

Shailene hopped down from the railing and walked back up the docks to place her hand at the small of Sam's back, "where's he going?"

"I don't know and I could care less right now," Sam whispered, voice quivering with suppressed emotion, "he's not headed back to the bunker, I can tell you that much."

"Alright," Shay murmured, "we need to get you home so you can rest. Cas, can you give us a lift back home?"

*at the bunker*

While Sam took a well-deserved hot shower, Shay poured herself two fingers of bourbon and went back to her room to listen to some music until the liquor lulled her enough to go to sleep. It'd been one hell of a day, and she needed to try and de-stress from it all before something else came along and blew up in their faces. The rim of her high ball glass had barely brushed her lips for the first time before her phone, sitting on the bedside table, began to vibrate.

"For fuck's sake," she grumbled, snatching the phone up and glancing at the ID, "well, well, well…" the daughter of John and Mary weighed the pros and cons of taking Dean's call before downing the two fingers worth of bourbon in one go and accepting the call.

"Hello, wayward brother o' mine," she drawled, "couldn't say your goodbyes in person?"

" _Shay, are you drinking?_ "

"I just got started, actually," Shay hummed, "so tell me, how'd you manage to keep the fact that there was a damn _angel_ riding in our baby brother's meatsuit from me for so long?"

" _I didn't call to fight with you, I called to say goodbye._ "

"I… _what_?" the younger Winchester twin's brain blanked out for a moment, "say goodbye? What the hell… Dean," she struggled for words, "you're gonna come back home. Don't be an idiot."

" _No, I'm not,_ " he reiterated, " _Shay, I can't… Sam was ready to die and I was too selfish to let him. Who knows what the hell might happen if I stick around and something happens to you or Sam, who knows what I might do to keep you both alive?_ "

"That doesn't mean that you have to stay away from us, Dean!" Shailene cried, "you're our brother and yes, you fucked up, but that doesn't mean you aren't our family. I'm not trying to downplay what you did to Sam, but it doesn't magically erase that you've always done what's best for us since we were children, even when it cost you. Yes, things are gonna be rough between you and Sam for a while down the road… but you can't just _leave_ ," tears began to cloud her eyes, "Dean, I _need_ you. I can't speak for Sammy right now, but I still need you."

" _I'm poison, Shay_ ," Dean's voice was shaky, " _the longer I stick around you and Sammy, the sooner you end up dead or worse because of me._ "

"Dean, _please_ …"

" _Bye, Shay._ "

The call disconnected, and Shay stared down at the blank screen, tears clouding her vision and dribbling down her cheeks to drip off the tip of her chin. Soft, hitching sobs began to tear out of her chest, and the huntress curled into a ball on her bed, hugging a pillow to her chest as she cried long into the night. The last thing she remembered was warm, calloused hands tucking her under the covers and the spark of pain she felt in her chest when she realized that it wasn't the loving touch or the brother she wanted.

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 **Hope you enjoyed it!**

 ***~* _CloudSpires1295_ *~***


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